From tegan0715_86517: first of all i just wanted to say a big thank you to anyone who has been so kind and caring and giving me advice it means a lot to me to be able to do this. today i decieded to go on a water diet bc i feel disgusted abt the way i look, i usually feel good abt myself but i saw like a tik tok which was like do i look good or am i walking around looking bad thinking i look good or sth along those lines and it was just such a big reality check for me, bc like is so true, everything is out of control and this is one thing i can control. it replaces sh atm which ig in one way is good but yh, and whenever i do eat i jst feel guilty
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From aliceisblue: Hallo Tegan, I really would like to encourage you to maybe have a talk with a dr or even a nutritionalist before attempting any diets, especially one that is not just limiting but completely ridding of any nutrition.
I have a sadness in my heart when I see tik toks like this and how it impacts others to view themselves. I find it has made it easier to spread the message of negative self talk and negative self image. While there is a lot of funny and endearing content, it’s very hard to monitor and drown out the negative at times, especially when we feel ourselves in a dark place.
I think there is a lot to be accounted for in society when we align food with the broad terms of good vs bad. I think guilt creeps in when we are constantly told to allow food to live in the limits of a moral attribution. And since these alignments are always changing, what are you meant to believe.
“Red meat is good”
“No red meat is bad”
“Vegetables are good”
“Only green vegetables are good”
This continuous cycle really creates a harsh concept in our minds or right and wrong when it comes to food.
I personally think we hold onto this guilt because it’s a deeper root of our difficulty to love ourselves.
I’d like to leave a link for you if you feel comfortable looking at
Be gentle with your body and your mind x
Hi tegan,
Isn’t that sinister? These moments or media that come along and tell us: “You know that thing that you feel pretty good about in your life? Yeah, you shouldn’t be so sure…” It’s this small whisper of doubt that gnaws at the foundation of our confidence…and even mighty trees in our life can be felled.
Put simply…small doubts can make a big impact in our life. Especially because they go under our radar. We don’t detect those thoughts as “lies”, so we believe they are truth. And then we build our lives around them.
If you really aren’t as good looking as you thought you were, you got work to do! You need to… X Y Z… eat less, water only, feel guilty when you break these rules, and generally just feel terrible about yourself.
This “truth” (that you don’t look good) actually keeps you trapped. Think about it. If the only thing you tell your brain is, “I don’t look good until ____” Do you know what happens when you get to that point? Your brain still thinks “I don’t look good until ____”. It will just change the “until”.
Let’s say you’re 150 pounds. And in the Tik Tok, the person was 120 pounds. And now, this new “truth” in your mind says, “I won’t look good until I’m 120 pounds.” For the next season of your life, every time you look at yourself in the mirror, you’re going to be telling yourself, “I don’t look good, I don’t look good, I don’t look good.”
Let’s say you’re successful and you become 120 pounds. What do you believe about yourself? Well you’ve been training yourself all this time to TELL YOURSELF, “I don’t look good.” So that’s still what you’re going to believe.
My point in saying all of this is this: these lies are DANGEROUS! Because they sound a lot like truth. And so we believe them hook, line, and sinker, and they can ruin our lives.
I don’t struggle with insecurity about my appearance, I struggle with insecurity about my achievements. I chased “success” my whole life, and the thing is, the more I achieved, the more insecure I got. It’s only until recently - after a decade of therapy and recovery - that I’m starting to realize and believe the truth…my achievements aren’t what make me loveable. I have to make that choice for myself.
Here are some real truths about me, that I believe to be true about you too: we are worthy of love. Right here, right now. Regardless of how we look or what we’ve acheived. I believe we are worth taking care of. Our bodies, our minds, our hearts. I believe we are worthy of people who love us. Good relationships. To be known, and to be loved. And none of that changes if we gain weight, or if we fail. We are worthy of love.