I couldn’t stop crying tonight. But I was the only person on my post tonight at work so I had to go in.
How do you call out of work when the reason you don’t feel good is because your depressed. “Hi, I’m sorry I can’t make it in today, I’m not feeling well” but I have no proof of what doesn’t feel well. No one can see it.
No one can see it yet it’s the most painful thing I’ve ever felt. My whole body hurts. Breathing becomes something I have to tell my mind to do repeatedly because I could care less if I stopped. Living becomes a chore and not a gift.
I can hear my brain screaming at the top of its lungs but I’m the only one who hears it. How is it so invisible but so real at the same time.
Just keep breathing I remind myself every 2 seconds.