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Belongs to: Therapist gets Sober by Tool
You just floored me with this video! My wife and I both struggle with alcoholism for different reasons but have the same demon talking in our ears. 
I want to save her and she wants to save me. I wish we could save each other.
I think its noble that you both want to help each other. It must be quite hard when you both are fighting the same vice. Alcoholism is a very hard thing to deal with, and overcome. Have you guys tried any addiction therapy, or counseling of any kind? I think that to do it a lone. Even if its two people alone. Is something that can be very difficult to achieve without proper support and guidance. Addiction is a very hard Demon to overcome, but it is achievable. Feel free to share more with us if you ever want/need. <3
Hello friend,
Thank you for sharing. I commend both you and your wife for wanting to take the steps to overcome your struggles with alcoholism. Addiction of any kind is a very difficult hurdle to overcome. It definitely requires lots of support. It is amazing that you are both supportive of each other and are on the same page in regards to seeking recovery.
Maybe including a professional 3rd party could be of some benefit to you both. Someone that can provide professional assistance and guidance and does not hear from the same demons. Even with the incorporation of a 3rd party, you and your wife can still help to save each other through your continued support and by holding each other accountable to your journey on recovery.
I wish you both the best, and I’m rooting for you! 
Hi friend,
I’m sorry to hear about what you’re going through - addiction can be such a tough battle, and I wish you all the best as you navigate the situation. I think simply the awareness you have regarding your struggles is already a great first step, especially when some people deny that they have a problem to start with. The fact that you do want to ameliorate everything is a good sign, and it’s just a question of getting the right help to move things forward:) I understand that you and your wife want to help each other, and I am glad that you both have a loved one to support each other, but I believe that getting an outside perspective and working your way to the root of the problem is what may help with making progress. Just maybe something to think about, if it hasn’t been considered already! I truly hope everything works out for you and your wife, and if ever you want to share more we are always here<3
It’s hard when your partner and you are facing the same struggle(s) at the same time. You want to support each other yet at the same time you are confronted to the fact that the relationship alone may not be an asset strong enough to keep you both head above waters. In a similar manner, my partner and I experienced depression and burn out at the same time, from similar traumas, and it’s been so difficult to feel on top of it that our relationship couldn’t breathe because of the way we were feeling. It’s hard to feel like you have to delineate what is about your needs, your partner’s, and the ones of your relationship.
To us personally, it has made a tremendous change to seek support outside of our own relationship and circle. Somehow, it has helped us - and me especially - to compartmentalize more the spaces and relationships I had in my life. My partner would know about my struggles, but he wouldn’t be my therapist or savior anymore, wouldn’t feel any pressure to hold this role - and vice versa. In the end, it has allowed love to be fully present, away from the urge we were feeling of saving each other. Somehow, the work that needs to be done is first and foremost lived individually, then it radiates on the relationship where we can hold each other accountable and be allies.
I hope with all my heart that your wife and you will manage to find and receive support - could it be from addiction/recovery groups, therapy or even the added support of friends and family. What you are going through is heavy, but you have been doing very strong already by acknowledging the problem and naming it. There is a life beyond the alcohol, and both you and your wife can reach it. I wholeheartedly believe in you and send you as much strength as possible from afar. You can do this. You can overcome this. 