Hi guys,
My name is Zinger. Well new account here, just made this account.
I think you might came here to teach, or to tell me not to suicide.
If you can teach me, it’s great, if you are here to convince me, read my story first.
I am just so done with my life.
I was a very happy boy in a happy family. I always feel like I am very lucky to be in my house.
That is, until now. I have watched corn, I am dreadul, useless, ashamed. My friend betrayed me today. That is a Discord friend, but we talked a lot and then he blocked me.
I am very addicted to corn, Discord and a bot named “Dank Memer”. And then, the bot keeps making me lose. I started to swear more, and raged and crazy.
I don’t have any friends in my school. No Bff or smt called like that.
My results is also affected due to the distractions and addictions. I’m already pissed off.
Now, when I am typing this long story, I started thinking: what have I done?
I am going to attempt to suicide this Sunday.
@Zinger I am sorry to hear about your struggles and the addiction. I also do not have many friends, which is very hard. There are hard times in life but it can change and we can change our actions and that is the beautiful thing about life. Do not judge how the rest of your life will go based on how it is going now.
Zinger,
I know things are hard, friend. But please do not give up. Things can get better. Keep pressing on and writing your struggles here. We are here for you and don’t want you to do anything to hurt yourself. You have so much worth and value.
It’s not possible to separate suicide from pain. It involves lot of pain, leading up to the attempt. Then, whatever method you try, will be very painful emotionally, and possibly physically.
I think you need who consider your addiction in a larger perspective. You are not lying, cheating, or stealing. You are not hurting anyone, except yourself emotionally. You are basically a very decent person. The urge that you are experiencing is natural, yet our environment is not natural. Once upon a time, there was no shame in nakedness, and I suspect because of that, people weren’t obsessed with each other’s bodies.
Therapy is available for managing addictions. I’m not sure what your circumstances are, but I think you could probably connect with someone who can help.
Ending your life because of this particular addiction is like destroying your car because you don’t like the hood ornament. There is much much more to you than this problem.
Discord friends can be unpredictable. There are a lot of very young people there, many of which have yet to develop emotional maturity. Therefore, it’s kind of inevitable that you will encounter some who pass negative judgment on impulse. Please don’t let fickle Discord friends mess you up emotionally.
You acted in a way that humans often do. There is no reason to feel guilty. Self forgiveness is empowering, which can help re-direct your thoughts in a positive and productive direction.
In spite of everything, life can offer many good things. Moments of joy can outweigh a lot of the bad stuff, in fact, they make life worth living.
Please stick around. Check back in with us as often as you want, and talk about whatever you want. I think that will help you.
hi there new friend,
I mean it when I say we’re glad to have you here with us. I must commend you on your well written post. Genuinely I mean that.
Very rarely have I heard someone state their addictions so clearly, without trying to defend it, or hide it. It sometimes takes people YEARS to understand and accept the idea that they may have an addiction, much less be able to tell someone else that!
So, well done you!
Being younger and being active online means that you’re exposed to people all over the place. Discord is filled with the good and the bad. Discord folks can hide behind a screen name and be mean if they wanted to be. I am so sorry that you felt betrayed by your friend. Having a friendship fall apart hurts, no doubt about that.
But life is full of the opportunity for new friends, new life experiences, new discoveries.
You talked to one friend, and got pretty close. That’s why it hurts so much.
But please please look at the positives: You now have experience in making friends, you learnt all the things not to do, like that person did to you.
You got friends here, you can also drop into any of the many HeartSupport streams.
I hope that these words reach you mind and that you know we all mean it when I say:
You are loved, you are worthy.
You are not your mistakes.
Your past does not define you.
You can have a new life by making changes to this one.
I believe that there is something wonderful that you have to contribute to this world, something only you can do? What are your other hobbies?
Hi Zinger
Thank you for your trust with sharing your struggles. Addiction can be a very hard nut to crack. It is doable tho. There are far worse addictions believe me. You can fight this. You have so much going for you dont lose hope. I know it seems hard but you are strong. You are so much stronger than you think. I believe you can make it. 
it is also a lot more common than you think. You bring worth to this world. Dont erase it bacause of an addiction. You can beat it. There are people that love and care for you.
Also there are worse things than being addicted to corn like… being addicted to popcorn… I am so sorry for this joke please dont kill me 
I just could not help it. Sorry.
I wish you all the best of luck and lot of strenght. Bye for now.
You are more than your addictions,
You are more than your mistakes.
Literally, every moment is a moment to look at our choices and choose what we want to do in that minute.
What may be super useful for you is to study your mind, your habits, see what patterns emerge from when you get these urges, what thoughts you have, what are things you tell yourself to give yourself extra time to go online.
What feelings are these online things fulfilling? What “happiness” does it bring to you?
There is life after addiction. All addiction is scary and hard. Your addiction is more of a hidden addiction, in that you’re not out drinking of using drugs, but you’re holing up at home and playing these games.
What does your social support group look like? Does anyone else know about these games?
Would look forward to hearing more from you. Your life has so much potential ahead of it. Please post again and let us know how you’re doing.
If things are very difficult, please do talk to a friend or a parent, or a hotline.
There is no judgement here, we just want you to live your best life, and we’re here to support your journey to that.
Hey @Zinger,
Please keep using the resources that are at your disposal as much as needed. And never hesitate to use crisis lines either. You may have some reservations about using them, but people working in those services are really givnig their time to support us during times like these.
These dark thoughts that you have are not worth it. These emotions that you feel can be managed progressively and peacefully. There is more to it. When we face an obstacle, we can try to slow down and see what are our options. Death is not one of these. And somehow, I think you know it because you are here.
I’d like to encourage you, tomorrow, instead of hurting yourself, to try to take the time to fill the following Safety Plan. Your strongest power right now is to say no to these thoughts and to take the steps that are needed to get out of this rut. We’re here to help. You’re not alone.
https://forum.heartsupport.com/t/about-the-safety-plan-category/24686
You’re loved. We’re in this with you. 
I hope @Zinger comes back and reads all of this awesome support. I’d like to hear if it helped them make a good choice. I hope they know they are loved.
Hey @Zinger,
Thinking of you today and sending love your way. Please be safe and take care of yourself if the dark thoughts are present. Make sure to reach out if that is needed too. There are brighter days ahead and so much more to experience in this life than pain.
We will still keep being here to support you. You’re not alone. I believe in you. 
Crisis support aren’t available in my country, they don’t give a shit to this.
there are online resources, as well as resources here as well, There’s also the twitch streams and discord.
This community is here to support you, you’re not alone as you go through this. A few persons here understand addiction well, they’ve been through it and survived, and others are in a similar position to you. There’s always another solution - sometimes it’s uncomfortable, or it’s a bit of work and it means opening up to our family and friends, experts and saying, “Hey, i need help with this, I can’t do this alone”.
You sound like a great person, please try to find the options that will work for you. Addiction isn’t a reason for ending things. We believe in you!
Thanks for coming back and reading through these posts. Your life and you have value and you have something unique to share with the world.
I think that when a person is suicidal it’s a sign that they need to escape from their current form of living. That is, the current lifestyle you have might be unhealthy. As someone who has been suicidal before, I can guarantee you that if you push yourself to complete small goals such as lowering the dose of anything that you’re taking until you can quit, going on late-night walks for artistic inspiration and finding something healthy to be addicted to, such as playing an instrument (and becoming ling ling) or weightlifting to get stronger and love our body more.
You are loved!
Hey Zinger, I made this little picture for you. I hope life is getting a little better for you. We love you and are always here for you. Much Love Lisa xx
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