I’ve been really not happy with myself and my THC use. I’m at the point where it’s just not worth it anymore. My tolerance is so high that I have to use a LOT to even feel it. Then, I don’t stay high for more than 20 mins, so I’m basically smoking all day. I make the excuse that it helps my pain levels, but to be honest…it really doesn’t anymore. What a waste of freaking money, right?
I’ve been short on rent for the past three months and because we rent from my boyfriend’s mother, she has us just paying what we can because we are both disabled. I’m not being held accountable for not paying or being short at all. My boyfriend smokes too sometimes and knows that if I want to buy, he can’t stop me.
If I want it, I’ll get it and I don’t care how… straight up.
I ran out on purpose this time and today is my first day sober. (so far)
I stopped keeping track of how many sober days I have years ago. I have my NA year of sobriety coin. I have my rehab completion coins… they meant something back then, but they don’t now because I’ve broken the streak so many times since. I try to remember how I felt when I got my coins, but I don’t remember anymore.
The past few days, I’ve just been kind of over it all. This morning I woke up with the “gonna quit” mindset and Cassy was streaming and during his stream of “what is your challenge” I found the courage to try one more time.
So, today is day one and I am going to keep track this time.
I think that is brilliant, I personally have never tried THC but if it doesnt do anything and costs money what on earth is the point? This is why I don’t drink, I refuse to pay for a headache. lol I promise to support you as best I can Rosie so please ask if there is anything I can do. Oh and put that money away if you can, my dad did that with his cigarette money years ago when he gave up and it has paid for so many things over the years. I couldn’t do that when I gave up smoking cos dad bought mine too lol. I love you, im super proud and you can do this. Day 1 - here we go.
Um… how frigging cool IS THIS?? You woke up with the intent, and you followed through!! confetti canon
I’m grinning like a fool here, Rosie!
One day sober is Great news! I’m proud of you. So glad you caught Casey’s stream and that could help you formulate the words and the thought clearly too.
Yes, I intend to. I was actually thinking about this last night. I want a new PC and the money I’ve spend alone this year on THC, I probably could have bought a nice gaming computer with. I put my addiction over everything.
The kitty is cute, I want a therapy cat -n- but I don’t have one so look at these cool guys! The last one is an Egret Orchid, one of my favorite Orchids. Looking at amazing things like this (aside from the googly eyes and bunny ears) makes one wonder how a creature could evolve in such a beautiful way. The secrets to the universe will forever be a mystery, but nature will always be a mystical beauty.