Hi everyone. Sorry I’ve been posting so much but life is getting pretty overwhelming right now.
I needed a place to get this all out of my head. My ulcers are getting bad and my husband asked me what I thought the issue was - food, stress, etc. I figured it was probably stress and it got me thinking about what all is stressing me… and it’s a decent sized list. So here we go (no particular order, they all stress me out, none of these things are minor to me):
1a) Inflation - I’m sure this doesn’t require explanation. Food cost for us has gone from $600 a month including less needed stuff like chocolate to now $1200 a month for just necessities, including the $300 a month we spend on baby formula when we can find it.
1b) Utility bills - bills have doubled in the past couple of months despite taking measures to use less electricity. My usual electric bill was around $100, but now it’s almost $200 and we keep the lights off all day.
1c) Housing market - Since we bought our house, it has appreciated in value by $50,000 which of course increases our property taxes which increases our monthly payments because we had to open an escrow account. Needless to say our budget is getting pretty tight with all of these price increases.
Baby formula - I’m sure we have all heard about the formula catastrophe in the US right now. We scramble to keep Kiera fed. At the same time, we still struggle at finding a formula that she will keep down due to her diagnosis of Noonan Syndrome. We have switched to Similacs Alumentum which is their most hypoallergenic formula and we’re not entirely sure it’s helping much
Kiera - Noonans aside, Kiera has had a really bad morning this morning. She had a little bit of blood at her g-tube site and she threw up her entire morning feed over 2 bouts of vomiting. She threw up a little bit again when I gave her just enough formula to give her some Tylenol. If she can’t keep formula down when I try to refeed her morning formula, I’m taking her to the doctor.
My husband’s wellbeing - My husband is still very stressed about his job. I won’t go into it but suffice it to say it has been causing his a great deal of distress and he is expressing an interest in anger management and starting to experience his self harming tendencies (He has Aspergers and when he’s really stressed out he will hit himself. He has never been this stressed since I met him almost 10 years ago.) And I feel bad because money. We can’t lose our house. We need to Keep Kiera save and healthy. Oh. Also Monday is his dad’s 1st birthday since he passed and my husband is already dreading it.
My health - I’ve been experiencing muscle cramps which likely means my potassium is low which is bad but I haven’t gotten around to calling my doctor yet. Been too busy tending to Kiera this morning. My ulcers are flaring. I’m dehydrated. I’m still struggling with my eating (I’ve had issues with food in the past. I’ve had times where I exhibited signs of anorexia and obsessive exercising and on the other end of the spectrum I sometimes have problems with binging also.). I am either losing weight too fast or gaining weight. I can’t find the motivation to take a shower until my hair starts getting greasy because there are other thing that need done and I am starting to not care anymore. Same with other forms of self care.
Family issues - Don’t even get me started
These are the most pressing things. I’m sure I’m forgetting something.